Their story
by Schmetterling aus Eis
Summary: The relationship between Mark and Derek, starting with their childhood..  WARNING: will be slash!   wow, my first fanfic ever and the summary already sucks! :D / Rated M for later chapters!/..and only to be safe..
1. Chapter 1

**My first fanfic I'm actually going to publish... If it's crap, please tell me! (Although I'm already convinced that it sucks anyways, but I'm happy about EVERY SINGLE review I might get..:D)**

**WARNING: English is not my first language, so please don't wonder about grammar or spelling mistakes! *puppy eyes***

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"Thanks a lot, Carolyn! I have no idea what we'd do without you! I'll pick him up tomorrow!" Samantha Sloan shouted while she was already leaving the Shepherds' garden without even looking back at her two-year-old son.

Carolyn Shepherd sighed and kissed little Mark's cheek while he watched his mother disappearing around the corner. After she was out of sight, Carolyn carried the boy into the living room, where her own son Derek was playing. He was just a few months younger than Mark and they had known each other for almost all their lives. (At the age of two, this didn't mean a lot, but it was still true…)

Mark spent almost every second day and night at their house, because his parents often had to work at night. When they had some time off, the Sloans went out instead of spending time with their little son. Since they were neighbors, Carolyn had soon found out about the fact that little Mark was most of the time alone with his chain-smoking, fifteen-year-old nanny, so she had offered to look after him herself instead.

Mark had been a very shy kid, who seemed to be afraid of every kind of physical contact, but Carolyn treated him like her own son and soon he was one of the most adorable kids she knew.

Carolyn's mother, who sometimes visited to help with housework, often found her daughter asleep with her left arm around Derek and the right one around Mark, who were also sleeping peacefully. Nobody would've ever suspected that one of the boys wasn't originally part of the Shepherd family, if it wasn't for his looks. While Derek's eyes were of a bright shade of blue and his dark hair was slightly curling when it got longer, Mark's hair was straight and much lighter and his eyes were cold and grey. Not to mention the fact that he was much taller and less skinny than his younger friend. But still, Carolyn considered little Mark as her son and Derek, when he was old enough to understand those things, would come to love him like a brother…


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello guys! I haven't got any reviews so far, so I'm going to try it with chapter two... Maybe there is some human being out there who wants to make a little girl happy.. ;) **

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„Mark! Hey Mark!" five-year-old Derek Shepherd shouted loudly. He was standing under one of the huge trees in the Sloans' garden. His friend's head appeared between the leaves and he looked frightened. "Shh! She'll find me!" he whispered. "Who will find you?" Derek asked and scratched his head in confusion. Mark rolled his eyes. "Marcia… She's the new housemaid. I-I…She's nice… but… She speaks only Spanish…" he explained. "Oh…" Derek said "I'll hide with you! It'll be much more fun together! But you have to help me! I...I'm not that...good at climbing trees" he admitted sheepishly. Mark forgot his fear of being found and laughed out loudly. He had just turned six some days ago and loved to tease his younger friend with the fact that he was much taller and stronger. "You're simply too short, midget!" he giggled. "I'm not! That's not funny!" Derek retorted. "Okay, okay, come on, I'll help you!" Mark gave in.

Hour after hour went by, but the boys didn't notice. They sat on the tree and had fun. Mark tried to show Derek how to climb properly and Derek told Mark everything he knew about the bugs he found.

At noon, when Marcia's car had disappeared, they climbed back down and ran over to the Shepherds' house. "Hey boys!" Carolyn greeted cheerfully when Mark and Derek entered the kitchen.

"I was just going to look for you! Were you playing in the house all day?"

"No, we were hiding in the tree! You know, the huge one next to-" Derek explained excitedly, but Mark groaned, "Oh no! You told her my secret hiding-place!"

Derek blushed. "Oh…Sorry…"

Carolyn laughed and asked, "But Mark, why do you need a place to hide? ... Is everything okay between you and your parents?", she added apprehensively.

The boy shrugged, looked down at his shoes and mumbled, "new housemaid… Speaks only Spanish… But Carolyn…? You won't tell my mum, will you?"

She tousled his hair and said, "Don't worry! It'll be our little secret"

Marks head snapped up and he asked with his cutest smile, "You promise?"

"Yes, I promise" Carolyn told him and smiled while he shot Derek a grin that said "See? That's how to make them do what you want!"

In the evening, the boys were lying in Derek's bed.

"Do your parents have to work tonight?" Derek asked.

His friend sighed, "No, they're going out…"

"Oh… And tomorrow?"

"They'll be home…" his friend whispered.

Mark listened carefully, until he was sure that Derek was asleep. "I wish my mum was a little more like yours…", he whispered into the darkness and thought about the following day. He would be in his own room with his parents sleeping next door. He would fall asleep and wake up in his own bed for the first time that week.

It was Friday…

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**Please let me know if there is ANYBODY out there, who wants me to continue! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Wow, I seem to be very creative today^^ Here's chapter 3! I just decided to update this story although I didn't get any reviews so far... Maybe some day, there'll be somebody who's happy about it... :)**

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There was no way out. Derek was standing in a corner of the boys' bathroom and hoped for a miracle while the three members of the football team came closer and closer. "We're gonna show that nerd what we think of guys like him!" one of them snarled. The next thing Derek felt was the boy's fist punching him in the gut. Just when he lifted his arm to strike for the second time, somebody opened the door.

"It slowly starts to get really embarrassing, Parker! Can't you choose a victim that's at last half your size? Leave him alone!"

Both of his friends had turned around and stepped back when they saw the uninvited guest, but the boy called Parker didn't react. His fist still up in the air, ready to slam down every second, he asked tauntingly, "And who says this?"

"Turn around, Parker!" the voice ordered, but it was interrupted by one of Parker's friends stuttering, "It's that Sloan-boy… I-I think we should leave!"

Parker cursed and let his fist sink. Mark shoved him aside to stand next to Derek. "Fuck, Sloan, what is it with you and that nerd…" Parker growled while he and his friends left.

"Thanks man! You saved my ass again…" Derek mumbled humiliated as soon as they were alone.

"Don't be ridiculous! Should I've let them kill you?" Mark said encouragingly. "Seems to be advantageous to be friends with the oldest and strongest boy in class…" he added with a smirk. Derek looked up to him and smiled.

Mark was the only boy in their year who was already 14 and with his new leather jacket and the wild haircut; he did really look quite impressive. `No wonder that all the girls adore him… He's definitely fuckin' handsome…´ Derek thought while watching his best friend. Two minutes later, he was already wondering about his own thoughts, but that seemed to be happening a lot lately… Just the day before, when they had gone swimming, he had caught himself thinking about how it would feel to be pressed against Mark's muscular chest… His friend had always been like a brother to him, but was it normal for brothers to think about such things? Or was it even normal for best friends?

Every night, Derek would lie awake in his bed and stare at the ceiling while thinking about Mark. In his mind, he saw Mark sitting in the grass next to the tiny lake near the woods, where they used to go swimming during summer. He'd smile his lopsided smile and brush aside his wet hair. The drops of water would cascade down his body and make it glisten in the sun… Derek sighed. Those images made him feel a little dizzy and –although he'd never admit it even to himself- quite sad and confused.

Had he known that only meters away, another boy was lying awake with the same thoughts, it would have been easier…

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**I normally don't beg, but I'm really desperate right now, so PLEASE (!) leave me a review! Even if it only says "Oh my god, please shut up IMMEDIATELY!" :D **


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay, last update for today... :) Good night! **

**(a bit short this time...Sorry! (but nobody seems to have read this story so far, so who cares? :D))**

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It was Christmas. Mark's parents were out of town and the 15-year-old spent the holidays with the Shepherds. The mood was somehow gloomy, because Derek's Grandma had unexpectedly passed away that morning. The boys were lying on the huge bed in their room, a nearly empty bottle of Whiskey between them. They were already quite boozed, but made no attempt to stop before emptying the bottle completely.

"Shit, buddy, Grandma is dead…" Mark cursed for the at least fifth time in ten minutes. Derek only nodded. "Damn, I can' believe it… Treated me 's if ah wasa par' of the fuckin' family! As if ah'd belong to all of ya, man!" he went on. "Wasa real lady, your grandma.. a real lady!..."

After ending his speech, he took another sip of Whiskey and the liquid burned down his throat. Suddenly, he heard a stifled sob coming from Derek. He was crying and Mark realized that he felt his eyes going all wet too. "Come on, buddy! Let's take this like real men! No weeping or stuff!" he declared decidedly and put an arm around Derek. That had been enough to let tears flow. Within seconds, they were both crying uncontrollably, but Mark still tried to soothe Derek with patting his hair affectionately. The alcohol had blurred his senses and he felt as if he was touching his friend for the first time. Mark felt the soft skin of Derek's cheek as he brushed away his tears and it felt amazing to him. His fingertips started to caress his best friend's face in circles, while he used his other hand to pull him closer. After some time –seconds, minutes, hours, it didn't matter- Mark found his lips pressed onto Derek's. Both boys froze for a moment, then they carefully started to move their lips against each other's and soon they were kissing passionately.

This had been the first kiss of that night, but many would follow. Mark and Derek would fall asleep all cuddled up and in the morning, they would awake, feeling safe and rested. The pain of grieving slowly fading away while they held each other close…

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**maybe I should start giving cookies to the ones that review this story...? XD**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello guys! This chapter took me quite some time, but it's finally finished. Please be patient with me for the next week! School starts again and I'm already quite stressed, but I'll try to update as soon as possible!**

**A big fat THANK YOU 3 to ****MadameSnow, lola, mariacheras, rolly21, marek and violetstar198 for their nice reviews! That was exactely what I needed! :D**

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Derek was dancing with Brenda Miller, but his attention was not at all focused on his date. He was watching another couple nearby. Mark seemed to be perfectly happy. His arms were wrapped around a tall, gorgeous girl with bright red hair curling down her back. He had introduced her as Addison. Derek couldn't stop looking at them and a strange feeling rose inside of him. Was it jealousy? `No, he thought, why would I be jealous? Addison is certainly beautiful, but there are many girls like her… She's nothing special or something…´ But the feeling didn't go away and when Mark and his date stopped dancing and sat down, Derek followed hastily, after whispering "I'm so sorry!" to Brenda.

"Hey, did you just-" Mark started, nodding towards Brenda, but Derek calmly interrupted him, "Shut up, man…" His friend shrugged and Addison giggled.

"And I thought, _she _was going to flee!" she explained, "I mean, no offense, but you are much too cute for being considered a man!" Another giggling fit followed and Derek gave Mark a questioning look. He shrugged and mouthed "too much alcohol" with an amused smirk.  
The three of them passed the rest of the evening together. Derek, who had been a bit skeptic at first, found that he enjoyed being in Addison's company. Even though the alcohol didn't really do her good, Derek noticed that she was not that kind of girl, Mark usually dated. She was funny, sarcastic and intelligent and not just a pretty thing without brains.  
In the early morning hours, they were still sitting at their table. Addison had fallen asleep ages ago, her head resting in Mark's lap, but the boys –or rather young man now- had been talking all night.

"I think we should leave now…" Mark said, "Addie, Addie! Wake up, sweetheart!" he whispered into her ear. She only groaned.  
"Looks like you've gotta carry her, man!" Derek remarked with a grin.

Mark nodded and patted him on the back, "Good night, buddy!" Then he lifted Addison up into his arms. Derek watched them go and once again felt a wave of jealousy rising inside of him.

The day after, he met Mark at the lake near the woods.  
"Hey! How did your date end yesterday? Did Addie wake up in the end?" Derek greeted his best friend. Mark smirked.  
"You forget something: I'm Mark Sloan!"

"Which means?"

"It means, she woke up in the cab and the first thing she said was `Your place or mine?´ I must have looked at her as if she had three heads, because she laughed and explained, `You are Mark Sloan! I'm sure that you can't name one girl that went out with you this year _without_ ending up in your bed! No girl agrees to go out with you if she's not ready for sex! Now that we've sorted this out, would you _please_ tell me _where_ you plan to screw me?´ Man, I'm tellin' you, that chick is absolutely crazy!"

Derek burst out laughing like mad. "Not funny, man!" Mark complained, but couldn't keep himself from smirking. His friend gasped for breath and said, "I knew she was different, but _that's _just killingly funny! What did you do then?"  
Mark rolled his eyes, "Come on, Derek! What would you have done if a gorgeous, sassy redhead throws herself at you like that! … And, damn man, it was worth it!"

Derek was still laughing, but deep inside of him, the familiar feeling of jealousy awoke once again…

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**I hope you enjoyed this chapter... :) **

**By the way: I'm not that confident about my English and I would really appreciate it, if someone could tell me whether it's okay the way it is or not... :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**I just got another chapter done... It didn't turn out the way I planned it and I'm not sure if it makes sense, but I'll let you decide about it.. :)**

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Through the following weeks, Derek noticed a sudden change of his best friend's behavior. After their first night together, Mark and Addison had been inseparable. He had even brought her along to the lake when he met Derek there. Derek seemed to have no problem with it, but Mark often caught him staring at them. One weekend, Addie wasn't there and the friends had some Mark-and-Derek-time. Mark took the opportunity to ask Derek for the reason of his staring. It was easy.  
"I'm just surprised… Normally, you don't meet a girl twice… Hell, you don't even greet them when you see them at school! And when you are with Addie, no other female being matters. Yesterday, when we went for a walk, a group of half-naked cheerleaders jogged by and you didn't even turn your head! Don't get me wrong, it's great! But I just need a bit of time to get used to it!" Derek explained with a grin, but it vanished when he saw his friend's face fall.

"Hey? What the hell is wrong now?"

Mark opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again. Then, in a barely audible whisper, he confessed, "You are right. I like Addie a lot… And it scares the shit out of me…I lied. She's not out of town today… I'm avoiding her, he stood up and threw a stone into the lake, his voice getting louder, She is everything a guy could wish for, but I… I'm just a dirty manwhore! She deserves something better! A relationship with someone who can give her what she needs! I…I'm just gonna screw it up…" Mark was angry with himself and reached out for another stone, but his hand was caught before he could reach one. Derek came up behind him and wrapped his arms around his friend. Mark started to relax and leaned back into his embrace. He felt Derek's lips right next to his ear and shivered when he started to talk, his lips brushing his earlobe.  
"You won't disappoint her! You just need to trust yourself! How could anyone want anybody else but you? "  
Distant memories of the last time they had been that close appeared in Mark's head and he gulped. It had been years ago, but he still remembered it like yesterday. It had started out like this time, with Derek trying to comfort him. Then, he, Mark, had turned his head to the right and their lips had met in a shy kiss. He remembered every detail… The feeling of Derek's soft hands brushing his skin after removing his shirt. The way Derek's wet lips had traced his neck and shoulders… And the feeling of Derek's growing erection against his backside, while Derek's fingers glided into Marks pants…  
He snapped back into reality and realized that history was repeating itself, but he still didn't move. Derek was breathing shakily and his hands were all over Mark, but suddenly he withdraw them again and whispered huskily "Forgive me!" before he turned to leave.

Mark still couldn't move. Thousands of thoughts kept running through his head. He was sure that he was in love with Addison, but the fear of screwing it up sat heavily on his chest. Then there was Derek… Why did it feel so right to be touched by him? And why _did _Derek touch him that way again? They had talked about it a hundred times. They were sure about the fact that they weren't gay! But what was is that made them unable to keep their hands off each other?  
Mark shook his head in confusion…

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**Hope you liked it! Chapter 7 will be about Derek's thoughts after walking away... **


	7. Chapter 7

Hi everybody! Sorry for not updating any sooner, but I had to get used to school again after nine weeks of holidays...

**Here's chapter 7... I do not really like it myself, but I don't really know how to go on... I hope that it's not as bad as I think it is.. :(**

**Thanks to everyone who reads this story and special thanks to the ones who reviewed! **

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Derek's POV:

_Why the hell did I do this? Mark is already confused enough! That's so typical for me! I try to help him  
and end up confusing him even more, just because I can't keep my hands off him. And _why_ can't I keep my hands off him! Okay, we kissed several times and had sex once, but that was something different! We were always lonely and sad or something like that! Just for comfort! But now he has this beautiful girl he seems to love, and what do I do? I act as if I wanted him for myself! What the _hell_ is wrong with me! _

Derek had reached the road and wanted to disappear into the house before meeting anybody. He had to be alone for some time. When he passed the Sloans' front door, he noticed someone sitting on the stairs.

"Hi Derek…" Addison said with a sad smile, "Are you okay? You are shaking!"

"It's nothing… Erm… Are you here to see Mark?" he tried to change the subject.

Addison sighed, "Yes… He hasn't answered my texts and calls for almost three days… I hoped to find an easy explanation, but…" Her voice broke and she had to fight back tears. Derek sat down next to her and put an arm around her. He wanted to tell her the truth. Tell her that Mark avoided her because he loved her and didn't want to disappoint her. Tell her to go to the lake immediately and take away his fears with a simple kiss. But Derek couldn't. Instead, he held her close while she was crying, brushed her tears away and comfortingly kissed the top of her head. It felt good. It felt right…

_Mark… Oh Mark, why are you doing this to her? This is where _you_ should sit! _You_ should be here to hold her instead of me! She needs you! She needs a strong person to look after her… Not a confused softy who occasionally dreams of you.  
You should be there for her…  
But you're somewhere in the woods… And I am here… And I like holding her like this… Maybe you're right… Maybe, she does deserve someone better than you…_

Derek's thoughts went on like this for hours, but he couldn't find another explanation:  
He had to be in love with Addison himself. Maybe this was what real love felt like… It was not like he'd imagined it to feel, but there was no other possibility. The thought of being in love with Mark was just too ridiculous to be true. They were like brothers! Okay… Brothers who occasionally had sex with each other. But still, they couldn't be in love…

Derek and Addison were still sitting there in front of Mark's door when it started to rain. Within minutes, they were soaked, but they didn't move. Two broken hearts and two minds thinking of the same pair of grey eyes…

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**As I already said, I'm not really happy with this chapter... I hope that the next one will get better again... :(**


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